More later.

Thought about it.
And yeah, I'm still upset.
Yesterday was the first sunday with out Crystal there.
I spent most of the church service crying.
There were some laughs though.
The service was more laid back and for the most part it was just a time for everyone to just be.
To just...try and support each other I suppose.
But I did, I cried.
I wished I could have had someone to hold onto.
But then, even if someone had been there.
I'm not sure I would have.
Because I'm not used to having someone to hold on to.

But I know I'll be okay.
I just don't know how long it'll take.
I just know that it'll definitely take a while.
I hope I'm more or less back to normal by the time Brian gets here.
I'd hate to be just....all emotional while he's here.
Though if he's here during the one year anniversy of her death then I'm sure he'll be here for at least one night of tears.

And....I guess I'll blog more later.
Like when my mind is more willing to attempt this.


XOXO,
Dollface.